Post by silygoosetaco on Sept 6, 2007 11:09:25 GMT -5
the most longest, heart spilling, emo classified, delusional poem i have every wrote. i havent read this in years and just reading it gave me such a harsh impact. please no harsh comments or saying i was pathetic or anything. im welll aware of that now and over it
For me, love is like a raging war
If u really couldnt tell
Struggles within my very soul
Like the suffrage u feel in hell
So let me tell you my story
On how it first began
From the best part of my life
To the misery where I stand
It began with courage
Putting myself on the line
For a girl I like or think I love
Wondering if shell be mine
If she said no, it be ok
Not much to regret for
Only pain of rejection
Leaves my heart slightly soar
But she said yes, like I expected
Because at that time I knew
She was happy to be with me
Because I loved her too
We were both very excited
To know what we just become
Our spirits filled with happiness
For the future that was to come
But sadly what we didnt know
From the very start we dated
Our past had unresolved issues
That was never even stated
But love helped us ignore it
Blinded us from the past
Each others thoughts of one another
Helped us forget at last
But the past wasnt the only thing
That has driven us apart
Her feelings for some one else
Stabbed me in the heart
Her mom doesnt like me
Because of what I am
Her friends dont agree
That I should even be her man
Plus there was the distance
We were far away
Seeing her once a month
Was the only possible way
So much pressure
Theres nothing I can do
I couldnt keep happy
I always felt so blue
I felt so ashamed
For being who I am
I felt like I didnt deserve you
I shouldnt be your man
I cried on some nights
Because my life wasnt fair
I knew I was going to lose her
Not enough memories to share
I felt so pathetic
For putting such a display
Crying over loss
That people think its gay
I loved her so much
Everything I had inside
Fighting with no hope
All I could do was cry
But my mind was so fixed
On what I must have
Death couldnt stop me
From loving her that bad
I wanted it to stop
But I was already engaged
For making such a commitment
Just to get out of my cage
Where life was dark
My future so unclear
Turn into something bitter
Against the ones I hold so dear
Depression over comes me
Abuse goes in my veins
Blaming myself for everything
For the emotions I cant contain
But that was what happened
Because the emotions broke free
She couldnt handle them all
So she decided to leave
I begged her to stay
I couldnt let her go
I didnt want the cage
The one you already know
She kept me so pure
I felt so alive
I already knew with out her
I would just want to die
She was so understanding
And the sweetest girl to know
So perfect in my eyes
I couldnt let her go
But her hearts some where else
Something I already knew
Hope is all lost
Theres nothing I can do
She says she still loves me
But not like we once were
Im happy to know that
But its not the same way I feel about her
She couldnt handle it
She didnt want me no more
She stop caring and loving
She started to ignore
It hurt me the most
On what she has done
So I left her alone
To accept what she become
It hit me so hard
Like I bullet in a gun
Knowing that shes gone
Knowing I'm not the one
I missed her so much
Practically every day
What Im telling you all now
Is just little what I have to say
I couldnt make it stop
What was in my head
The emptiness in my heart
Felt like I was dead
I regretted my actions
My heart was cold inside
For just yelling at her
To see her one more time
She didnt want to listen
She was deaf to me
She didnt even care
On whats going on inside me
I got fed up with it
I couldnt make her see
The only thing I can do
Was just simply leave
My heart was so broken
On what had just occurred
Just then I knew
No one was good as her
My friends told me different
Said I could find better
If I got another girl
Ill forget I ever met her
I knew they were wrong
On what they just said
I thought of her every day
Constantly in my head
I kept myself occupied
On every thing I can find
But every time theres nothing
She ends up on my mind
Every thing Ive seen
Every thing Ive heard
Every happy couple
Reminded me of her
I got very jealous
It was so unfair
Knowing she was happy
And I dared to care
I tried other people
But they werent good as her
Personality, beauty, and sweetness
Wasnt even close to hers
I gave up completely
On the love for some one else
Forgetting love and importance
And every thing in myself
My future is gone
It makes me so sad
I just couldnt believe
I lost every thing I had
I want it back
I want it so bad
Ill never let go
Even if drives me mad
If theres no chance
Ill simply give up
My life will be ruined
Every thing would be corrupt
I need to go away
To take away the pain
To forget what I want
Before it drives me insane
The army I must go
To get this out of my head
Instead of having suffrage
I might as well be dead
So Id rather have god
Take me by the hand
To take me away
From the misery where I stand
Ive been fighting a war
Inside my very heart
Praying for it to end
Wishing it didnt start
I lover her so much
To the day that I die
Im not going to deny
I aint gonna lie
But I have to move on
Even when I dont want to
But this what I must tell her
I cant live with out u
For me, love is like a raging war
If u really couldnt tell
Struggles within my very soul
Like the suffrage u feel in hell
So let me tell you my story
On how it first began
From the best part of my life
To the misery where I stand
It began with courage
Putting myself on the line
For a girl I like or think I love
Wondering if shell be mine
If she said no, it be ok
Not much to regret for
Only pain of rejection
Leaves my heart slightly soar
But she said yes, like I expected
Because at that time I knew
She was happy to be with me
Because I loved her too
We were both very excited
To know what we just become
Our spirits filled with happiness
For the future that was to come
But sadly what we didnt know
From the very start we dated
Our past had unresolved issues
That was never even stated
But love helped us ignore it
Blinded us from the past
Each others thoughts of one another
Helped us forget at last
But the past wasnt the only thing
That has driven us apart
Her feelings for some one else
Stabbed me in the heart
Her mom doesnt like me
Because of what I am
Her friends dont agree
That I should even be her man
Plus there was the distance
We were far away
Seeing her once a month
Was the only possible way
So much pressure
Theres nothing I can do
I couldnt keep happy
I always felt so blue
I felt so ashamed
For being who I am
I felt like I didnt deserve you
I shouldnt be your man
I cried on some nights
Because my life wasnt fair
I knew I was going to lose her
Not enough memories to share
I felt so pathetic
For putting such a display
Crying over loss
That people think its gay
I loved her so much
Everything I had inside
Fighting with no hope
All I could do was cry
But my mind was so fixed
On what I must have
Death couldnt stop me
From loving her that bad
I wanted it to stop
But I was already engaged
For making such a commitment
Just to get out of my cage
Where life was dark
My future so unclear
Turn into something bitter
Against the ones I hold so dear
Depression over comes me
Abuse goes in my veins
Blaming myself for everything
For the emotions I cant contain
But that was what happened
Because the emotions broke free
She couldnt handle them all
So she decided to leave
I begged her to stay
I couldnt let her go
I didnt want the cage
The one you already know
She kept me so pure
I felt so alive
I already knew with out her
I would just want to die
She was so understanding
And the sweetest girl to know
So perfect in my eyes
I couldnt let her go
But her hearts some where else
Something I already knew
Hope is all lost
Theres nothing I can do
She says she still loves me
But not like we once were
Im happy to know that
But its not the same way I feel about her
She couldnt handle it
She didnt want me no more
She stop caring and loving
She started to ignore
It hurt me the most
On what she has done
So I left her alone
To accept what she become
It hit me so hard
Like I bullet in a gun
Knowing that shes gone
Knowing I'm not the one
I missed her so much
Practically every day
What Im telling you all now
Is just little what I have to say
I couldnt make it stop
What was in my head
The emptiness in my heart
Felt like I was dead
I regretted my actions
My heart was cold inside
For just yelling at her
To see her one more time
She didnt want to listen
She was deaf to me
She didnt even care
On whats going on inside me
I got fed up with it
I couldnt make her see
The only thing I can do
Was just simply leave
My heart was so broken
On what had just occurred
Just then I knew
No one was good as her
My friends told me different
Said I could find better
If I got another girl
Ill forget I ever met her
I knew they were wrong
On what they just said
I thought of her every day
Constantly in my head
I kept myself occupied
On every thing I can find
But every time theres nothing
She ends up on my mind
Every thing Ive seen
Every thing Ive heard
Every happy couple
Reminded me of her
I got very jealous
It was so unfair
Knowing she was happy
And I dared to care
I tried other people
But they werent good as her
Personality, beauty, and sweetness
Wasnt even close to hers
I gave up completely
On the love for some one else
Forgetting love and importance
And every thing in myself
My future is gone
It makes me so sad
I just couldnt believe
I lost every thing I had
I want it back
I want it so bad
Ill never let go
Even if drives me mad
If theres no chance
Ill simply give up
My life will be ruined
Every thing would be corrupt
I need to go away
To take away the pain
To forget what I want
Before it drives me insane
The army I must go
To get this out of my head
Instead of having suffrage
I might as well be dead
So Id rather have god
Take me by the hand
To take me away
From the misery where I stand
Ive been fighting a war
Inside my very heart
Praying for it to end
Wishing it didnt start
I lover her so much
To the day that I die
Im not going to deny
I aint gonna lie
But I have to move on
Even when I dont want to
But this what I must tell her
I cant live with out u